"It is hard to know what is possible, and then to not see it.
It is hard to be reminded of what has been and what could be, but is not.
It is hard to see people open their eyes, only to close them again.
It is hard to know, and be reminder, of what is at hand."
Before
The evening was great. I went with Stefan and Ebie Es (friends from Potch). While walking to the queue of 5000 (?) people in from of N1 city His people, I bumped into Johan. Johan Hurter is a guy I met at Bethel (2010-2011). It feels like yesterday. I have forgotten that I waited for an open door from May 2011 to Dec 2011. Anyway, Johan tried to get into 1st year BSSM (Bethel school of supernatural ministry) for quite some time. He is going over to Redding again... not to do BSSM, but to semi-intern.
I think about people like that. They have tasted, and seen, and want to be where it is happening - no matter the cost. And that is what Johan is doing. If he can't climb the mountain he will go around it, else dig a tunnel through it. And somehow God respects out determination, and gives us our desires.
Randomly I bumped into Varkie (nickname of a guy) - he was in rez with me in Potch. He told me about being a teacher, never having time, and how draining it is.
* An ant just bit me in the neck. I don't get their logic. If they are alone, they should not take on giants (memo to self)
Varkie is back into the corporate world, in book keeping. He is also studying part time. It looks like its going well with him. He is saying that he is enjoying having weekends without school activities. [That is one reason why I did not go teach at a private school - they own you 24/7]
Also bumped into Quirts and Drian (from Potch), Fifi & Craig from Grahamstown, and a girl from Bethel that is in Knysna. People from Stellenbosch, and Deepriver don't count as random, but I saw a couple of them also. So, I saw about 6 random people out of 5000. I know that the conference is a subgroup of people - so the odds of meeting people I know is much higher. I could hear from the crows that there were many people that were familiar with Bethel. So, something like this (Jesus culture) draws bethel people out from the woodwork (so to say).
So, generally you have about 1/1000 chance of meeting someone you know. 1/2000 if you are at a random public place. Anyway.
The meeting
So, the worship was good. The talk inspirational, and seeing a few people get healed in the crowd was cool. And all the more it hinted at what was possible, and what I have known. At one time people started to spontaneously sing. But that did not last long.
I do not know. Corporate meeting (church gatherings) are canvases of another kind. Things can happen corporately, which is difficult to make happen in another context. I think it has to do with the sum being greater than the parts. Everyone adds something to the whole, and then stuff happens to everyone. So, on the one side I want the corporate to be a revival atmosphere, and on the other hand outside corporate to be full of God moving & fellowship & vocation. Well... I know it is possible. I have seen it, elsewhere.
How can it come? Let revival fall in the corporate, so that people want to stay. Then send them out, but keep the corporate revival flame. Preach on how God moves, and how you respond to Him. Talk about testimonies, and give examples of people bringing God into the 'everyday life'. The end is worth the process - and some have gone before you, so the road is trodden, and there is wisdom for what is to come.
Another
We are looking for another to take the lead, to break the ice, to set an example. We all are, even the preacher. The first guy is the cast out. They choose to be different, and live differently. Usually they are a bit rough around the edges, and step on people's tows. They have to make peace with being odd, and no-one understanding them. They live with a struggle of never knowing the difference between breaking ground and offending authority. Sometimes they give up the struggle, and go for open rebellion, so that they can break ground without a constant doubt of authority. Other times, they stop breaking ground and rather submit sheepishly under authority. I take my hat of for them regardless. They are heroes, even if they are rebellious. I say so, because I have walked in their shoes, and many of them I know. So yes, we want the mavericks – the ones that stand alone, for the sake of the vision.
So when does the change happen? Well, it happens somewhere when more people join the maverick in his exploits. And here you get into all the funky stuff that causes problems in churches.
So yes, we need the mavericks, but will we love them unconditionally when they show up? Or will we just wait for another more kosher one?
Yes, we need the mavericks, but who will father them?
Crossroads
We stand at crossroads, again and again and again. Which way do you choose, will you be responsible, will you be wise, will you love, will you respect, will you be bold, will you lead, will you submit.
Sometimes it is too much for me. Or rather, it is: to walk on the heads of needless, along a hair-thin path. My knowledge exceeds my wisdom, and there is none beside me. So, I encourage, and I stand with Christ.
This is what happens when I am reminded. Knowing what can be, and fighting to calm my heart thereafter. But it is enough, or rather, more than enough.
I would rather live with the knowledge of what could be, without ever seeing it, than to live a life without knowing.
It is hard to be reminded of what has been and what could be, but is not.
It is hard to see people open their eyes, only to close them again.
It is hard to know, and be reminder, of what is at hand."
Before
The evening was great. I went with Stefan and Ebie Es (friends from Potch). While walking to the queue of 5000 (?) people in from of N1 city His people, I bumped into Johan. Johan Hurter is a guy I met at Bethel (2010-2011). It feels like yesterday. I have forgotten that I waited for an open door from May 2011 to Dec 2011. Anyway, Johan tried to get into 1st year BSSM (Bethel school of supernatural ministry) for quite some time. He is going over to Redding again... not to do BSSM, but to semi-intern.
I think about people like that. They have tasted, and seen, and want to be where it is happening - no matter the cost. And that is what Johan is doing. If he can't climb the mountain he will go around it, else dig a tunnel through it. And somehow God respects out determination, and gives us our desires.
Randomly I bumped into Varkie (nickname of a guy) - he was in rez with me in Potch. He told me about being a teacher, never having time, and how draining it is.
* An ant just bit me in the neck. I don't get their logic. If they are alone, they should not take on giants (memo to self)
Varkie is back into the corporate world, in book keeping. He is also studying part time. It looks like its going well with him. He is saying that he is enjoying having weekends without school activities. [That is one reason why I did not go teach at a private school - they own you 24/7]
Also bumped into Quirts and Drian (from Potch), Fifi & Craig from Grahamstown, and a girl from Bethel that is in Knysna. People from Stellenbosch, and Deepriver don't count as random, but I saw a couple of them also. So, I saw about 6 random people out of 5000. I know that the conference is a subgroup of people - so the odds of meeting people I know is much higher. I could hear from the crows that there were many people that were familiar with Bethel. So, something like this (Jesus culture) draws bethel people out from the woodwork (so to say).
So, generally you have about 1/1000 chance of meeting someone you know. 1/2000 if you are at a random public place. Anyway.
The meeting
So, the worship was good. The talk inspirational, and seeing a few people get healed in the crowd was cool. And all the more it hinted at what was possible, and what I have known. At one time people started to spontaneously sing. But that did not last long.
I do not know. Corporate meeting (church gatherings) are canvases of another kind. Things can happen corporately, which is difficult to make happen in another context. I think it has to do with the sum being greater than the parts. Everyone adds something to the whole, and then stuff happens to everyone. So, on the one side I want the corporate to be a revival atmosphere, and on the other hand outside corporate to be full of God moving & fellowship & vocation. Well... I know it is possible. I have seen it, elsewhere.
How can it come? Let revival fall in the corporate, so that people want to stay. Then send them out, but keep the corporate revival flame. Preach on how God moves, and how you respond to Him. Talk about testimonies, and give examples of people bringing God into the 'everyday life'. The end is worth the process - and some have gone before you, so the road is trodden, and there is wisdom for what is to come.
Another
We are looking for another to take the lead, to break the ice, to set an example. We all are, even the preacher. The first guy is the cast out. They choose to be different, and live differently. Usually they are a bit rough around the edges, and step on people's tows. They have to make peace with being odd, and no-one understanding them. They live with a struggle of never knowing the difference between breaking ground and offending authority. Sometimes they give up the struggle, and go for open rebellion, so that they can break ground without a constant doubt of authority. Other times, they stop breaking ground and rather submit sheepishly under authority. I take my hat of for them regardless. They are heroes, even if they are rebellious. I say so, because I have walked in their shoes, and many of them I know. So yes, we want the mavericks – the ones that stand alone, for the sake of the vision.
So when does the change happen? Well, it happens somewhere when more people join the maverick in his exploits. And here you get into all the funky stuff that causes problems in churches.
So yes, we need the mavericks, but will we love them unconditionally when they show up? Or will we just wait for another more kosher one?
Yes, we need the mavericks, but who will father them?
Crossroads
We stand at crossroads, again and again and again. Which way do you choose, will you be responsible, will you be wise, will you love, will you respect, will you be bold, will you lead, will you submit.
Sometimes it is too much for me. Or rather, it is: to walk on the heads of needless, along a hair-thin path. My knowledge exceeds my wisdom, and there is none beside me. So, I encourage, and I stand with Christ.
This is what happens when I am reminded. Knowing what can be, and fighting to calm my heart thereafter. But it is enough, or rather, more than enough.
I would rather live with the knowledge of what could be, without ever seeing it, than to live a life without knowing.